


Side Effects

by Master of Unlocking (Hikarinimichitasora)



Category: Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare, Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: M/M, prompt, tv
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-02
Updated: 2016-03-02
Packaged: 2018-05-24 07:43:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,418
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6146453
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hikarinimichitasora/pseuds/Master%20of%20Unlocking
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Symptoms: Elevated heart rate. Difficulty breathing. Tightening in his stomach. Anxiety. Light-headedness. Clammy palms.</p><p>Alec didn't realise when he shared his strength with Magnus that it would have these weird side effects....</p>
            </blockquote>





	Side Effects

**Author's Note:**

> Written for ladygawain on livejournal: http://ladygawain.livejournal.com/83265.html?thread=926017#t926017

_Symptoms: Elevated heart rate. Difficulty breathing. Tightening in his stomach. Anxiety. Light-headedness. Clammy palms._

Alec listed the symptoms to himself, frowning slightly as he tried to puzzle them out. He'd shared his power before. He and Jace had shared each other's strength more times than he could count. Yet he'd never had these symptoms before.

Perhaps it was the parabatai bond that prevented them?

He scrubbed harder at the blood on the couch.

_I feel like I'm having a panic attack..._

But Magnus looked unaffected. He moved around the apartment with a sureness of grace that Alec almost envied. Collecting two glasses and bringing them over to a liquor cabinet. The low light caught the gold threads in his clothing, the glitter under his eyes, but also revealed that Magnus wasn't suffering any of the similar side effects of the sharing of his power. Was it because Magnus was a warlock?

"Magnus-" Alec realized he'd said the other's name out-loud and snapped his mouth shut. What was he thinking? Magnus would hardly want to help him without reward, even if he _was_  sick. The warlock was only helping them now because of his connection to Clary,

"Hm?" Magnus stopped what he was doing, the tip of his finger against the rim of a long-stemmed glass. If Alec had to describe it, he'd almost say that Magnus was caressing it. He wondered why he was describing it at all.

"Nothing..." Alec replied, determined not to ask. He didn't know why, but he felt that asking Magnus about this might be one more crack in the Lightwood facade he was trying to build.

"You know I have magic for that right?" Magnus asked, his tone light in jest. He was pouring some mixture into one of the glasses now. Alec looked at the blood-soaked rag in his hand, a reminder of how he'd shared his strength with this warlock.

"I think you've exerted yourself enough for one day," he replied, trying to be flippant even though his heart still felt like it was in his throat.

"Drink break?" Magnus held up two drinks, an inviting smile on his face. Alec sighed, standing up. A drink... It might help him relax. If these side effects were going to last much longer, he wouldn't be able to sleep tonight. Surely better to have a drink and then definitely sleep later than to lay awake all night tossing and turning and wondering what other symtoms might develop?

Magnus was watching him carefully. Alec took the offered long-stemmed glass from his hands. The effect was worse when he was closer to Magnus. Was that a lingering effect of the power share? The way his stomach tightened...

Magnus clicked his fingers and the drink was suddenly lit on fire.

_So much for me telling him not to exert himself. He's going to waste magic anyway by showing off..._

"To us," Magnus said, trying to hold his gaze. Alec couldn't make himself meet it though. He let his eyes skitter to the side. He felt... nervous. He clenched his hand around the glass in the hope that Magnus wouldn't see how sweaty his palms were.

The drink was strong, which was welcome but almost certainly designed to get him drunk. He grimaced and when he opened his eyes he saw Magnus looked amused. But then, what was new? Magnus always looked vaguely amused, or vagely alarmed or vaguely lustf-

Alec stopped his thoughts there.

"Why did you ask for me? When Jace and Clary were both here?" He didn't mean the question to be as aggressive sounding as it was. Magnus looked surprised and perhaps there was a flicker of hurt too that passed across his features? Alec felt his heart thump hard in his chest.

"Hm," Magnus had hidden whatever expression Alec had seen behind the same amused mask he'd had before.

"Jace didn't tell you?" Magnus drew a deep breath and turned away. Alec swallowed, realising he could suddenly breath much easier when he wasn't the focus of the warlock's attention. "Doesn't matter. It was a lie anyway."

Magnus began to play with his ear, running fingertips over the piercings in it. Alec watched the metal glint in the light for a moment, gathering his thoughts.

What if these feelings... weren't symptoms of the shared magic at all? What if...?

"Are warlocks always this cryptic?" he asked, trying to do anything to keep the conversation going while his thought processes caught up. It was a shame that it appeared his brain only ran at half-speed when he was this close to Magnus.

"I'm not being cryptic. I'm being coy," Magnus replied and there was no doubt now. Alec couldn't pretend that this wasn't flirting.

"Let me spell it out for you. I wanted to see you again," Magnus said and Alec wanted nothing more than to run away in that moment. He just _said_  it. Just put it out there, so unashamedly. Magnus didn't apologise for his wants, his desires. He just laid them out for everyone to see.

The silence had gone on too long and Alec knew he had to say s _omething_.

"Why?" he asked.

"Why'd you come?" Magnus shot back. Alec felt his throat constrict. All those symptoms, all those side effects, they were there, running rampant through his system and he couldn't pretend that it was the magic anymore. This was his reaction to _Magnus_. It was so different from what he felt for Jace that he could barely even compare the two emotions. He couldn't tell if it was attraction or fear or...

"I'm not sure," he replied, and he wondered why out of everyone, he chose to tell the truth to Magnus. That was the crux of the matter, wasn't it? He _wasn't_  sure. He wasn't sure about anything anymore.

Magnus looked lost. His eyes darted around, his expression seemed strangely wistful. Alec wished he'd been able to say something more meaningful, but he'd met the man only a few times. What more was he expecting?

"For almost a century I've closed myself off from feeling anything for anyone. Man or woman. You've unlocked something in me," Magnus' stare was piercing. The glitter under his eyes seemed almost like tears, even though Alec knew that they weren't.

He had to look away, down at the drink in his hand. He couldn't respond to Magnus' feelings. He could barely work out his own. And his family...

When he finally collected his thoughts, he looked up to see that Magnus wasn't looking at him either. His expression was strangely vulnerable, like he had unexpectedly offered more of himself than he had been intending and now knew there was no way to take back what had been said.

Alec opened his mouth, not even sure what he was about to say when his phone rang. The moment was broken and Alec didn't know if he was grateful or angry. He answered the phone. His mother. Mission. The Institute. Reality.

"Duty calls," he said after he hung up. Magnus had turned away to look out of the skyline of Brooklyn, but he turned back now. The vulnerability, the awkwardness, it had passed. The confident, amused, graceful Magnus was back.

"Ah, yes. Maryse must be recruiting you for something unseemly," he jested, as though he knew Alec's mother personally. Alec guessed it was possible that he did.

"Listen Magnus I wish I-I-I I could just- I don't know what-" Alec tried to get words out but that damn tightness in his throat made it almost impossible. Magnus put a finger up against his lips to silence him. Although he didn't touch skin, Alec could feel the warmth. A few milometers and they'd have touched. But Magnus didn't push it.

"I understand," Magnus said, and with that Alec felt some of the anxiety leave him. He could still feel the sweaty palms and the racing heart, but there was something else too. He couldn't help the smile that spread across his face. He believed Magnus, he believed that Magnus _did_  understand. Magnus probably understood more than Alec had worked out himself yet.

"Stay for just one more drink? And then decide," Magnus suggested, knocking back his own drink deftly. Alec met his eyes, trying to see if there were any motives behind the request.

All he saw was understanding.  
  
_Symptoms: Elevated heart rate. Difficulty breathing. Tightening in his stomach. Anxiety. Light-headedness. Clammy palms._

_Diagnosis: Side effects of hanging too long around Magnus Bane._


End file.
